Girl + Computer = ?

Now that I am of legal drinking age, I’ve been able to start going to bars in the downtown district. It has been hugely enjoyable, and its a nice excuse to spend some time with my older brother, Jack, the one person in town that is over 21 that I like to spend time with.

The other night we went to a coffee shop/bar called the Rendezvous and sat by the window discussing music recording software. I had an idea for a programming endeavor that would ideally record music as a person is playing it, analyze the notes being played, and generate a visual representation of it that could be printed and hung on a wall. Jack has been playing guitar for years so I needed a little background on current recording software capabilities.

After an hour of just the two of us brainstorming and imagining, one of our close friends met up with us. Joe, is probably the closest thing to a third sibling for Jack and I - Joe has been Jack’s best friend for over a decade, and we all grew up together. We just sat around chatting until our other friend, Nick, tagged along.

So there I was, the lone girl in a group of guys. Definitely not something unusual for me, or even something I was unhappy about. Part of why I feel like I get along best with other guys is because of my close relationship with Jack and with Joe, so spending time with them and our friends - regardless of gender - is pretty comfortable for me.

However, we managed to stumble upon a serious discussion that was not one I had ever even come close to having with them - rape.

Now I have definitely had plenty of time to mull over what I think about rape and how our culture perpetuates this behavior despite laws restricting it. In the course of taking a year of gender studies classes - as well as just living as a female college student - I have taken an honest look at all the different components coming together that allows rape and sexual assault to happen in our society. Discussing these opinions I’ve gathered with my brother and our friends was not at the top of my to-do list for this night out.

I can’t recall exactly how the discussion began, but my friend Joe was talking about how he heard about a girl who went to a frat part for Halloween at his school who was wearing an extremely revealing costume and was raped at the party. Although not agreeing with the idea that a drunk girl “should have seen it coming,” he felt that she should have been more careful around a group of horny, drunken guys, especially in the way she was dressing. 

Almost instantly, my brother crafts a comeback about society creates hyper-sexual men. Much was discussed about sexual tendencies of men, and whether an uncontrollable urge to procreate was human nature rearing its ugly head or a behavior allowed by our culture.

To me, though, it seems incredibly obvious that rape is not about the sex, but about the power. Plenty of rapists have attacked their victims despite having another source of sex. Rape has been used as a tool of war since the dawn of people.
Its also not about the sexiness of the victim either - I know several girls who have been attacked when wearing perfectly modest clothes.
Either way, using “sex” for a reason for rape makes it easier to place blame on a victim if they were somehow luring the attacker to act. Its as if somehow, the victim had been wearing something less “slutty” they’d have avoided the whole situation. 

So I bring this idea up. 
The guys are rather surprised.
The entire discussion shifts away from sexual urges to power struggles between people. 
Joe takes back his statement from earlier about the girl needing to be cautious. 

I HAVE IMPACTED THE WORLD.